3 min read

I Will Attack And You Don't Want That

Into the squared circle of symbiotes, mobile games and Marvel Comics #1.
Detail from VENOM #21.
They fight, and fight, and fight and fight and fight.

It's another Tuesday! It's been over a week without refined sugar and I have the mood swings mostly under control! But by God these endless High Evolutionary decks are driving me insane. I picked up ol' Herb myself but at this point I would rather suffer a million defeats than lower myself to playing such a deck. I would rather play a Double Goblin deck like a teenager on a phone plan their parents paid for, I swear to almighty God. Every deck I meet is High Evolutionary, his cronies, Sunspot, Lockjaw, Rogue or Enchantress to counter Luke Cage... it's like clockwork. It's as regimented as the macarena. Well you won't break me! I'll never be one of you! WONG FOREVER! WYNDHAM NEVER!

For those not playing Marvel Snap... eh, you're probably better off.


Venom #21, that's what!

The cover of VENOM #21, by BRYAN HITCH, showing Bedlam in his new costume/fight mode.
Coming to a Marvel Snap deck near you, probably. (I have no idea.)

This is an unashamed fight comic. It's Eddie Brock vs. Eddie Brock, and I hope it's not a huge spoiler to tell you that Eddie Brock gets chewed up and spat out. CAFU provides us with the first round, and then at the bell he tags in Pere Pérez for the second half, and Frank D'Armata on colors provides the knockout finish. What a knock-down, drag-out, bare-knuckle brawl we have waiting on the comic shelf for you, folks! What displays of extrememe physical discourtesy we are putting in front of your eyeballs! Hide the children, keep all pets indoors, throw a cloth over the budgie's cage, you have never seen the like! Wuxtry, wuxtry, all in color for a mere three dollars and ninety-nine cents American! Who will buy, who will buy? Never mind that, who will DIE? Grab your copy while stocks last, grue believers!


It's been a while. Has it been a while? It has been a while. Time to turn to page 2 of Marvel Comics.

The caption reads "Within the hour, newsies are on the street with an extra!" A newsboy is pictured, waving a paper and shouting excitedly: "Extra! Read all about the man of fire - the - Human Torch!"
A newsie, on the street with an extra.

It's our first sight of the world outside the Horton residence! The world outside your window, if you will. It's more suggested than shown - any serious detail in the buildings beyond a few lines gesturing at high-rise concrete would draw the eye away from where it belongs. And it belongs on the "newsie" - a newsboy, or a newsman? I seem to recall tales of rival newspaper distribution networks cutting up real rough on the mean streets of New York back in the day, so it's possible this figure is exactly as tall and muscular as he appears to be - but maybe not. There's something distorted about him that I suspect is on purpose - the way his entire body, his entire figure, is leaning in, emphasised by the speed lines, every part of him throwing itself forward in a way that makes his body parts feel like they're racing against each other to deliver this most urgent possible news.

What news? News of the HUMAN TORCH, of course! Large letters for a big figure – so important he's got an extra out within the hour. That's not something they'd do for any old simulacrum in a tube – it probably involved movable type or some such malarky. (Side note - the repeated "Extra!" here brings the call of the newsboy to mind - "Extra, extra! Read all about it!")

We get the message. We're entering the outside world only because the Torch is entering the outside world, in a big way. And how! Wait, what's the name of the paper? "The Fireman"? Oh - well, no wonder they're printing extras, it's a specialist publication. Obviously firefighters would be interested in an artificial man constantly on fire. Stand down, folks, turns out the Human Torch is just another schmoe in the big city.


It's getting late, and tomorrow's a full day - but for now, this is still the place to find me. Love and strength to those who need it, and I'll play us out with "The Power" by SNAP!

It's gettin' kinda heavy.